OCD & ERP Tracker
This Notion template is designed so that people with OCD can track their compulsions, how they respond to triggers, and their progress through their exposure hierarchy over time. It has the major caveat that tracking compulsions can itself be compulsive, so that feature should probably only be used for short periods to get a snapshot of OCD symptoms. This template features a network of databases that relate to each other in a way that shows the structure of OCD, as I understand it.
More about thisDo Not Feed OCD
I made this as a reminder to not feed OCD by giving into compulsions, whether that's asking for reassurance, giving it to someone else, or a whole host of other compulsions. Response prevention is how you starve OCD and break the cycle! The animal I chose to represent OCD is a mouse, because a friend calls their OCD "little mouse" as in "If you give a mouse a cookie..." Anyone who wants to put this somewhere as a reminder for themselves or others is welcome to. Feel free to contact me to ask for specific aspect ratios.
More about thisthalamus
There is madness inside all of us.
There was a time where such madness
was passed into my conscious attention
Ungated
Again and Again
a Torrent
Besieged by such thoughts images and urges
Bathed in them
Until I knew nothing
Until I couldn't argue anymore
Until all I could say was, "I don't know."
And when I knew I didn't know,
And let that be,
The walls began to restore.
The images were there, but half there.
The madness began to be below the surface —
It's still there.
My brain will likely boil again.
Who knows how?
Who knows what theme?
All I know is Now.
Certainty
I call this one certainty because of the way the eye interacts with it. Try it: how long can your eye stay in the calm and light of the center before it's drawn into the chaos all around? In my experience, a temporary feeling of certainty is achievable through compulsions, but it's always temporary. There's always chaos again, until one stops seeking certainty at all.
More about thisIntentionally Ugly
I made this piece as part of a workshop on using ugly art to overcome perfectionism. Indeed, this piece triggers me! It's triggering to look at it, and it's even more triggering to share it — which of course means it's great exposure. I welcome insults on this one, if you've got any. Thanks!
More about thisHard Light
Judge me as you will.
May each blemish be overexposed
and outlined in deep shadow.
In the clarity of your clear blue sky
may I be the montster.
May you be bright and sure.
But—there is wisdom in softness.
And maybe later I could see you,
in hues of gold and blue,
in midtomes,
and I'll tell you:
each nuance I see
is beautiful.
It's Hard to Feel Like Flossing Matters
It’s hard to feel like flossing matters,
When the votes are in,
When they want you dead,
When they’re getting their way —
Or like it matters
If I wash my hands an extra time,
Or pick my skin a bit,
Or shower a bit long.
In a few months, we’ll see;
Maybe sooner, who knows?
But for now, I’ll get my passport,
And consider making my birth certificate binary,
And wonder if I pass,
And I’ll confess:
I didn’t floss last night —
But I did this morning,
And I’m drinking water,
And I'm checking in on friends,
And nothing is over yet.
I Felt a Funeral
In this project, I chose to illustrate the last stanza of Emily Dickinson's "I Felt a Funeral" by giving the words visual actions. I chose "I Felt a Funeral" because of how the poem conveys my experience of OCD. I once got stuck repeating it in my head, until I found the significance of the "then—" which places the funeral at a point in time and provides a bridge to the next thing.
More about thisGentle
You don't have to make sense
You don't have to continue this way
You don't have to
It's okay to be disliked
It's okay to have dark thoughts
It's okay to
Sometimes you need sustenance
Sometimes you need beauty
Sometimes you need rest
Sometimes you need
